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Adventures of Mugundaman in DC
MugundaMan
#1 Posted : Thursday, April 11, 2019 5:48:12 PM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 1/8/2018
Posts: 1,700
Location: DC (Dustbowl County)


Currently loading...

"The fool says in his heart, "There is no God." - Psalm 14:1
Dustbowl County is the Future of Kenya.
**1700 posts = Adios (for real this time!)**
hardwood
#2 Posted : Thursday, April 11, 2019 10:29:45 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 7/28/2015
Posts: 8,944
Location: Montevideo, Uruguay
We are still waiting. Kwani mbundles ziliicha???
Ecclesiastes 9:7 So go ahead. Eat your food with joy, and drink your wine with a happy heart, for God approves of this.
MugundaMan
#3 Posted : Friday, April 12, 2019 3:01:02 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 1/8/2018
Posts: 1,700
Location: DC (Dustbowl County)
hardwood wrote:
We are still waiting. Kwani mbundles ziliicha???


Laughing out loudly

Yes. Thankfully DC has very smoooooooth Safcom Fibre sasa so adventures zinakuja hivi karibuni.
"The fool says in his heart, "There is no God." - Psalm 14:1
Dustbowl County is the Future of Kenya.
**1700 posts = Adios (for real this time!)**
tycho
#4 Posted : Friday, April 12, 2019 10:28:24 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 7/1/2011
Posts: 8,476
Location: Nairobi
MugundaMan wrote:


Currently loading...



Kwani ni nutty professor, na si Joe Weider? Sawa the former makes better adventures...
MugundaMan
#5 Posted : Saturday, April 13, 2019 7:50:52 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 1/8/2018
Posts: 1,700
Location: DC (Dustbowl County)
tycho wrote:

Kwani ni nutty professor, na si Joe Weider? Sawa the former makes better adventures...


Ulisahau description ya MM?

Quote:
Short, fat, balding man with big Naija jaws and a heavy Rick Ross beard and shades who, according to several sources on Wazoo, partitions and hawks dustbowl plots in the middle of nowhere for a tidy profit. Like total man Biwott before him (RIP) "nobody really knows where he lives" but rumoured to shuttle between his squalid bedsitter near Kitengela Prisons and the remote wood cabin he is building in Ngatateak that has stunning views of Mt Kili. In his younger days he was a radical revolutionary anarchist complete with dreads, MC Hammer pants, Che Guevara tee shirt, Kenya Army avunjaas and Jomo leather jacket. Time and life has since mellowed him down. Dustbowl ambassador and Kenya mongoose breeders chairman emeritus. Once worked on a black ops project where he saw with his own two eyes a very famous (but recently dead) celebrity undergoing MK-ULTRA shock therapy at a RAND programming lab in Encino, CA. On the run from 7 different alphabet agencies for exposing so called "conspiracy theories" that are fact in reality. Truth is truly stranger than fiction.

"The fool says in his heart, "There is no God." - Psalm 14:1
Dustbowl County is the Future of Kenya.
**1700 posts = Adios (for real this time!)**
MugundaMan
#6 Posted : Saturday, April 13, 2019 8:03:35 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 1/8/2018
Posts: 1,700
Location: DC (Dustbowl County)
Adventure # 1:

That Nairobi is rising is economic fact. An economist once said that the easiest informal way to tell whether an economy is rising or not is to gauge how many active construction sites there are per street. Nairobi today is one huge construction site. Soon we will start giving our big brother China slight competition for the honour of having our national bird renamed the "Crane." Construction crane that is. Tippers and trailers are everywhere and everyone seems to be involved in the construction industry in one way or another. From the hawker on the street selling cheap Chinese padlocks and hand tools to the towering GTC headquarters contractors that are single handedly changing the skyline of the green city in the sun. I was walking along back streets around River Road the other day - I like to explore - and was shocked to see just how vibrant these lessser visited parts of the CBD are.

River Road and surrounds are no longer the dark dingy crime and vice filled backwaters we were warned against visiting in the 80s and 90s. With their glitzy shops selling the latest tech, hardware, fashions and gizmos, these shops would not be out of place in Guangzhou or Prague or any other major world city. The smell of commerce is palpable literally everywhere. As you approach any shop, the cunning merchants are already calculating pricing ranges to allocate to you based on what you are wearing, how gullible you look or how wealthy you seem to be. But I digress. Recently I was in Jewel in the Crown (Kitengela) in Dustbowl County and something strange happened to me. Something I will never forget....

TBC

"The fool says in his heart, "There is no God." - Psalm 14:1
Dustbowl County is the Future of Kenya.
**1700 posts = Adios (for real this time!)**
wukan
#7 Posted : Saturday, April 13, 2019 11:43:49 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 11/13/2015
Posts: 1,128
MugundaMan wrote:
Adventure # 1:

That Nairobi is rising is economic fact. An economist once said that the easiest informal way to tell whether an economy is rising or not is to gauge how many active construction sites there are per street. Nairobi today is one huge construction site. Soon we will start giving our big brother China slight competition for the honour of having our national bird renamed the "Crane." Construction crane that is. Tippers and trailers are everywhere and everyone seems to be involved in the construction industry in one way or another. From the hawker on the street selling cheap Chinese padlocks and hand tools to the towering GTC headquarters contractors that are single handedly changing the skyline of the green city in the sun. I was walking along back streets around River Road the other day - I like to explore - and was shocked to see just how vibrant these lessser visited parts of the CBD are.

River Road and surrounds are no longer the dark dingy crime and vice filled backwaters we were warned against visiting in the 80s and 90s. With their glitzy shops selling the latest tech, hardware, fashions and gizmos, these shops would not be out of place in Guangzhou or Prague or any other major world city. The smell of commerce is palpable literally everywhere. As you approach any shop, the cunning merchants are already calculating pricing ranges to allocate to you based on what you are wearing, how gullible you look or how wealthy you seem to be. But I digress. Recently I was in Jewel in the Crown (Kitengela) in Dustbowl County and something strange happened to me. Something I will never forget....

TBC



Tell me about it my longtime fundi now has a diary and you have to book him like a month in advance.

I told you that huko downtown things are changing. Even the big boys are starting to notice

Quote:
A section of small scale traders in Nairobi on Friday censured the Anti-Counterfeit Agency (ACA) after chaos broke out as it raided several shops in the central business district and confiscated goods.

The raids were conducted after a HP private-eye, Halliday Finch, informed the agency that two shops in the area were dealing in counterfeit HP products, said Ibrahim Bulle, ACA’s officer in charge of enforcement of operations in the Nairobi region.

But the traders, through the Importers and Small Traders Association of Kenya (ISTA), claimed the agency stormed their premises despite a notice they issued earlier seeking guidelines and a cordial hunt for the products.

“They ambushed us early in the morning. Some shops which were not yet open were broken into and the goods therein; whether genuine or counterfeit, seized,” said Francis Njau, chairperson of the Crossroad Zone of the ISTA.

He claimed the agency broke into five shops, resulting in retaliatory attacks by traders, hence the chaos and the deployment of anti-riot officers.
https://mobile.nation.co...712-13ombk2z/index.html

hardwood
#8 Posted : Saturday, April 13, 2019 2:06:00 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 7/28/2015
Posts: 8,944
Location: Montevideo, Uruguay
tycho wrote:


Kwani ni nutty professor, na si Joe Weider? Sawa the former makes better adventures...


Ni “Kijana fupi, amenona round, huwezi jua tumbo ni wapi na mgongo ni wapi. Mulmuwas."
Ecclesiastes 9:7 So go ahead. Eat your food with joy, and drink your wine with a happy heart, for God approves of this.
MugundaMan
#9 Posted : Saturday, April 13, 2019 5:17:21 PM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 1/8/2018
Posts: 1,700
Location: DC (Dustbowl County)
wukan wrote:


Tell me about it my longtime fundi now has a diary and you have to book him like a month in advance.

I told you that huko downtown things are changing. Even the big boys are starting to notice



I must say I totally agree. I was pleasantly surprised kabisa.
"The fool says in his heart, "There is no God." - Psalm 14:1
Dustbowl County is the Future of Kenya.
**1700 posts = Adios (for real this time!)**
MugundaMan
#10 Posted : Saturday, April 13, 2019 5:19:08 PM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 1/8/2018
Posts: 1,700
Location: DC (Dustbowl County)
hardwood wrote:
tycho wrote:


Kwani ni nutty professor, na si Joe Weider? Sawa the former makes better adventures...


Ni “Kijana fupi, amenona round, huwezi jua tumbo ni wapi na mgongo ni wapi. Mulmuwas."



Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly
Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly Laughing out loudly

100% pure TRUTH
"The fool says in his heart, "There is no God." - Psalm 14:1
Dustbowl County is the Future of Kenya.
**1700 posts = Adios (for real this time!)**
MugundaMan
#11 Posted : Sunday, April 21, 2019 12:08:38 PM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 1/8/2018
Posts: 1,700
Location: DC (Dustbowl County)
Apologies for the delay, shugli zilikuwa mingi, but this is what happened...

PART 1

Dustbowl is a very interesting place. Rongai, Ngong, Kiserian, Matasia, Kerarapon, etc, and especialy Kitengela. On this particular day a few weeks ago, I decided to do some exploring like I had never done before. So I arrived in Jewel in the Crown (Kitengela), parked at KCB (jameni one of the few places in Dustbowl County you can happily use your KAPS card!) and decided to saunter off on foot just to explore -like a regular mwananchi- mdogo mdogo.

By the way KCB Kitengela Plaza is also a fascinating place in itself. Aside from the bank, there is a peculiar mix of shops and a glitzy middle class restaurant with an outdoor seating area that pipes soothing tunes into your ears as you munch on a meal that competes with the best meals you can find anywhere in upscale Nairobi proper. There is also a shop that sells water pumping equipment next to it. Very dustbowlesque mix if you ask me. But I digress.

Haya, so instead of turning "right" upon exiting Kitengela Plaza on foot, I swerved left, towards the main bus stage. That (paved!) footpath leading to the bus stop is quite interesting. A whole gaggle of hawkers has set shop there selling everything from weaves, to sports shoes, to earphones, to handkerchiefs, to beaded jewelry to solar powered lights & radios and everything in between. They do not have the aggressiveness and cunning of Nairobi CBD hawkers though. Every hawker sits patiently and waits for the customer to approach and take an interest first before the subtle negotiation begins.

Kitengela main bus stage is a sight to behold. To be honest, it is a spitting image of the Ngong bus park but with a double story set of shops in the midst of it. Other than that there is cabro everywhere and no trees whatsoever (just like Ngong's). Someone needs to rectify this. There is also a public toilet there that charges ten bob per use. Woe betide your nose once you step in though. The urinals are fetid despite being built juzi juzi. That concentrated effluent that is as a result of the scorching heat during this dry season has scalded the urinals with unsightly ammonia stains that no clean water seems to ever flow over.

Outside is a buzz of activity with all sorts of vendors selling their wares from wheelbarrows and hand carts. Delicious bananas for 10 bob, watermelon slices, and two things that caught my attention. First was slices of coconut wrapped in polythene. I have never seen this anywhere else even in DC. And polythene wrapped pineapple slices that attract bees. The pineapple slices are not unusual but the swarms of bees are. Funnily enough the bees do not seem to bother anybody. They just hover around your pineapple slice and nobody seems to pay any attention to them. After munching on one of the sweetest pineapple slices I have ever tasted under the hot sun, it was time to get some transport into Kitengela proper.

Unlike Ngong where bodas are the only option to navigate into the lesser accessible suburbs of the town, Jewel in the Crown has several options. You can take a boda; there is a huge aggressive mass of them right at the entrance to the bus park. Or you can take a mathree that is Isinya Kajiado or Namanga-bound. Or you can take what I took - a shared tuk tuk!

A tuk tuk is the cheapest option but also the most uncomfortable. By law only 3 passengers are allowed, but Kitengea tuk tuks squeeze in a whopping 6 passengers before they depart. So there Mugundaman was, cramped in a ball (mulmulwas) on the drivers right hand side, his elbow frequently digging into my ribs with each turn of the comical, piki-piki-like handlebars. Neck craned at a curious angle ; bent and warped. Knees painfully pressed against the metal casing in the front of this small vehicle.

After an agonizingly slow drive full of incredible noise from what looks like a water pump motor type of engine, I could not take it any more. "Shukisha Kitengela Mall," I barked, relieved when I finally emerged from my cramped tuk tuk experience.

Kitengela mall is even more impressive than I expected. A massive edifice of glass, steel and very high quality finishings. It was a bit empty in terms of foot traffic but then again it is a spanking brand new mall that is slowly becoming the hub of Kitengela's CBD and this takes time. Even Acacia Supermarket next to it has had to give itself a paint job and slight upgrade because the shine of Kitengela Mall had started to make the formerly popular Acacia look like an eyesore of an embarrassment

Idling around exploring the mall, I noticed a good number of Nairobiesque looking slay queens. To imagine Kitengela ten years ago would have a ritzy mall like this full of urbane, pretty young things would be laughable. But now NOTHING ever surprises me in Kitengela given the turbo force development pace that Jewel in the Crown is undergoing and will continue to undergo for a very long time to come. Naivas inside Kitengela Mall must be hands down the poshest Naivas in Kenya. In fact Naivas should begin a premium line of supermarkets to cater to elite clientele and this particular branch would definitely qualify as the first of many. After enjoying my fix of Kitengela Mall, something astonishing drew my attention to the opposite side of the street.



As little as 5 years ago, the "opposite side of the street" was a low lying, dust-infested, depressing looking row of one story, green, bright red or blue buildings that every Kenyan is familiar with if they have ever driven past any rural town in Kenya. As you know, for these types of structures, Safaricom has painted the building green for free with garish white lettering all over it, and inside is a dark dingy cove best associated with dodgy bars and filthy eateries.

What astonished me is that brand new glass-facade cellphone shops complete with neon lights, expensive gadgets and young attendants are starting to populate that once shameful row of buildings. Jameni Davis and Shirtliff has opened a full branch there. And day by day that row is turning into a nice set of retail outlets that I never imagined would make their home there in my lifetime. New, good quality buildings have also emerged further down the street towards Milimani, complete with well done landscaping, fast emerging trees and well built cabro lanes between them that minimize the legendary DC dust.

The recently tarmacked slip roads look very well done up close and are a delight to walk past. All we need is a heavy downpour from the long overdue rains to wash Kitengela CBD clean and it will be a wonderful sight to see.

That the buzz of business activity in Kitengela is crazy is an understatement. Everywhere you look, the shops are construction related. Duka la vioo, swarms of hardware stores until you lose count, timber yards all over the place, tile shops and so much more. A long row of brand new excavators sits menacingly facing Namanga road right at the heart of the CBD, taunting passers by to hire them. Delivery trucks and trailers galore similarly wait for customers. Their cunning looking owners pacing around, well-dressed with faces that do not look like they are struggling at all. Given the hundreds of thousands of brand new homes being built in Kitengela's suburbs, their next order is always never too far away.

At this point I was already hooked on exploring this beautiful city. You cannot help but be motivated in your own personal projects by the hubbub of business activity in this town. Everybody is talking about a business deal, a project, a plot, a delivery to be made. Kitengelans are not idle people! And since this is a very young and very new city, there is a newness to even the dreams of its inhabitants. Everything is within the realm of possibility.

Chances are if you are a renter, you will have a flood of newly built options at affordable cost and high quality to choose from. Any wonder half of Nairobi has moved here? In the restaurants talk of plots for sale or purchase is inescapable. Young cities full of promise all share this trait. Then the small matter of lunch arose.

After my terrible experience in the tuk tuk, I decided to flag down a boda boda instead. I must say it was a refreshing experience having the wind blow in your face and helping cool you off in the heat! Destination was where else but Yukos Inn!

If you have ever been to DC and have never stopped at the legendary Yukos Inn, you really have never been to DC at ALL. The garden is not much to write home about, but the soft whoosh of traffic outside and acacia trees that give a good shade make you settle into vacation mode very fast. You have to try the tomato-laden mbuzi wet fry with ugali and the greenest sukumas with onions that I have ever seen in my life. My friend if you do this and do not love Dustbowl at this point there is something very, very wrong with you.

After lunch I did some more exploring in the area around Yukos. The crazy pace of developments here is mind boggling. As far as your eye can see on both sides of the highway, all sorts of construction projects are in various stages of completion. Just being there made me feel I need to get a commercial plot bordering Namanga road in the area before they run out and prices go to the hundreds of millions. Those who have already done so are the smart ones. This corridor is the future and what better pole position to be in than right on the highway of the fastest growing town and corridor in Kenya today, Thika Road excepted.

Stoked to no end by what I was seeing, decided to call it an early day as we all know about Mombasa road traffic. So I travelled back huyooo to KCB to pick up the car and head home. The sun was already starting to set and as I drove down the highway towards MSA road it casted a radiant flood of orange that spattered everything along that road in a mesmerising golden yellow. As I passed "over the bridge," I noticed the curious sight that the river was completely dry but some wananchi were busy digging the riverbed for remnants of water still available underneath. At the MSA road junction I also noticed for the first time that our beloved "windmill street lights" are gone! Why? why? whyyy?? They were an iconic introduction and welcome into Kitengela. Whoever removed them needs to be sacked pronto.

And as I cascaded down Mombasa road back to East and Central Africa's most beautiful and vibrant capital city, I was full of ambition and ideas inspired by lovely Kitengela. Kitengela is like a beautiful lady you have a crush on. She is endlessly fascinating to look at and marvel about and wish upon. And she always keeps you on your toes by keeping up with the latest fashions and looks that fascinate you to no end. And woe betide you if you waste time in wooing her! Lesser mortals will do so and leave you gnashing teeth for life.

Shalom.

"The fool says in his heart, "There is no God." - Psalm 14:1
Dustbowl County is the Future of Kenya.
**1700 posts = Adios (for real this time!)**
AlphDoti
#12 Posted : Sunday, April 21, 2019 1:01:26 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 6/20/2008
Posts: 5,966
Location: Kenya
I'm glad you stopped bringing the other nonsense you came in with lots of mioto. I had warned you that you are new and any had tried in vain.

This is now good stuff. I enjoyed reading your piece. Keep up!
MugundaMan
#13 Posted : Sunday, April 21, 2019 8:34:03 PM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 1/8/2018
Posts: 1,700
Location: DC (Dustbowl County)
AlphDoti wrote:
I'm glad you stopped bringing the other nonsense you came in with lots of mioto. I had warned you that you are new and any had tried in vain.

This is now good stuff. I enjoyed reading your piece. Keep up!



What a way to give a compliment Laughing out loudly
Asante nimeshukuru. Sina ubaya na wewe hata kidogo my good buddy, despite our differences of opinion on matters religion. Let's live and let live.
"The fool says in his heart, "There is no God." - Psalm 14:1
Dustbowl County is the Future of Kenya.
**1700 posts = Adios (for real this time!)**
Kusadikika
#14 Posted : Monday, April 22, 2019 1:56:48 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 7/22/2008
Posts: 2,491
Mugundaman you have a gift with words. I last passed by Kitengela many years ago and have never stopped there but reading your vivid account I felt like I was walking there with you.

Start a blog. You have the passion about the place. You are a keen observer and you can translate that observation into words. You have everything it requires to generate content. Add a few pictures and I think you can rival or even beat Bikozulu.
MugundaMan
#15 Posted : Monday, April 22, 2019 2:23:47 AM
Rank: Veteran


Joined: 1/8/2018
Posts: 1,700
Location: DC (Dustbowl County)
Kusadikika wrote:
Mugundaman you have a gift with words. I last passed by Kitengela many years ago and have never stopped there but reading your vivid account I felt like I was walking there with you.

Start a blog. You have the passion about the place. You are a keen observer and you can translate that observation into words. You have everything it requires to generate content. Add a few pictures and I think you can rival or even beat Bikozulu.



Asanti.
"The fool says in his heart, "There is no God." - Psalm 14:1
Dustbowl County is the Future of Kenya.
**1700 posts = Adios (for real this time!)**
hardwood
#16 Posted : Saturday, May 11, 2019 4:14:22 PM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 7/28/2015
Posts: 8,944
Location: Montevideo, Uruguay
Dustbowl is red haaawt!!!!



Ecclesiastes 9:7 So go ahead. Eat your food with joy, and drink your wine with a happy heart, for God approves of this.
tinker
#17 Posted : Saturday, May 11, 2019 4:54:03 PM
Rank: Member


Joined: 11/15/2010
Posts: 361
Location: Nairobi
hardwood wrote:
Dustbowl is red haaawt!!!!





I also 'inspected' Ngong-Kiserian stretch and I must commend the contractor, he is doing neat and professional job.
It will be remembered that, this is one of the road that used to get potholes immediately after previous cow-boys left the site.

Unfortunately the chinese building this stretch are exposing KENYA POWER, so many live power posts are still in the middle of the expanded road and some posts are hanging dangerously. I hope they are not waiting for a disaster to happen for them to act.

Someone has indèed slept on his job.

....He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion..
AlphDoti
#18 Posted : Sunday, May 12, 2019 11:05:21 AM
Rank: Elder


Joined: 6/20/2008
Posts: 5,966
Location: Kenya
Hey @mugunda, allow me ask you about the current market price of land 15km from Isinya town into Olenkurian road?
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